'Tis the season of parody, spoofs, make believe and role playing. You've just witnessed a whole series of youngsters parading at your door, 'tricking and treating'. Probably, like me, you had some challenging moments trying to recognize the young persons in their costumes and make-up. You also witnessed the delight that they experienced when you 'failed' to see through the disguise and were obliged to pay the penalty.

It occurs to me that this little charade, that we all indulge in once each year, adds a great deal to the quality and depth of our relationships with the neighborhood children. They put on a 'role' and we pretend to be both mystified and then enlightened. We are able to see them in another form, perhaps one that has special meaning to them, be it Superman, Darth Vader or Princess Leia. It is a persona that they aspire to become in childhood fantasies.

The act of make believe seems to add something to the child, and even adds something to the relationship we have with him or her. Play has long been recognized as something which is both therapeutic and which facilitates learning. Why do we forget so quickly how to do it, and the value it has for our life? Adult play is something else. It has rarely been accepted as an integral part of our work – because it lacks 'dignity'. Yet, it's how we best learn about new realities, skills and relationships. These are vital attributes for survival and success in today's demanding work environment.

Is it part of the 'adult ethic' to put away childish things? Are we possibly denying ourselves an invaluable tool for learning as well as a major device for stress relief? Once each year, we condone it – it's fine to play as we pursue our normal work. The day is special for so many of us on this account. So why don't we indulge more often?

These are times of high stress. There are no known drugs or therapies that compare to simple play. Who says that it lacks dignity? I wish I could relax my sphincters a little more easily, so I'm going to practice from this point on. Please understand, I'm not becoming undignified! I'm simply trying to be more effective without incurring higher stress.

Why don't you join me – let's have some fun as we learn new coping strategies.