According to Daniel Goleman, author of recent top selling business books, "Emotional Intelligence" and "Working with Emotional Intelligence", success at any organizational level is a product of the degree of "emotional competence" displayed by an individual. A key component of Emotional Competence is the ability to relate with others in constructive ways.

While self awareness and personal value-sets are very influential factors in how we relate with and to others, our success is mainly determined by our Relating Style - how we "choose" to behave towards others. Often though, our choices are not deliberate or conscious ones. Raising our awareness of options and consequences, and enhancing our skills in personal flexibility and impulse control, will increase our successes, both specific and general.

There are four reference points in Relating Styles, each described in terms of Direct / Indirect Communication, and Deliberate / Spontaneous Control. These are explained more fully in the Staying in Touch section of the Andros Website . Why not evaluate your dominant and back-up styles while you're there - it's simple, fun and informative!

The optimal profile, of course, would be one which is perfectly balanced between all four Styles. This offers the ready ability to move deliberately to whichever Style is most appropriate for the circumstances. Should your profile indicate a tendency to prefer one or two styles above the others, you could consider a review of your answers to each question to see where you could "live with" an alternate response. In this way, you s-t-r-e-t-c-h your horizons to good advantage.

Another mind expanding experience is to enlist the help of some close friends or colleagues - or even a "360 evaluation" - wherein others offer their assessment of your Relating Styles. Just remember to ensure objectivity by allowing anonymity and by averaging the submissions. (It's wise to avoid provoking unnecessary relationship conflicts!)

When the development course is clear, you could use a personal action plan to indicate precisely what action you will take, with whose help, and by when you'll have the action started and/or completed. All the assistance you need to get started is in the Staying in Touch section of the Andros Website www.andros.org.

Good Luck!